In Memories Of!
by Kuki17
Summary: Seeing his team at a mall after 6 years was not Vivek expected when he went to mall that evening. Memories of the girl that he never got to confess his love to, hit him like a truck. And he decided just to embrace his fate. A note for the readers of Suit and Tie at the end. Please read that.


Song used is **Never Fade** by my most favorite drummer, my drum hero **Josh Devine** and **Ollie Green**.

If you want to feel this piece of writing, please listen to the song. It is so so amazing and they were singing with so much feels. When I listened to that songs for the first time few months back it stuck inside my head. Since then, I always listen to it. Atleast once a day.

And it has something that gives you feels.

* * *

 **Vivek's POV.**

Moving back to Mumbai after 6 years was maybe not a such a good idea on my part. Everything just rushed back to me and hit me like a truck, when I saw them in the mall today, only helped my already hurting heart to feed on its pain ten folds more.

After that, I just dropped my plan to do the shopping for my household and came back. To the flat I rented. I thought I was over it and that's why I came back to this city where everything started. But, boy was I wrong. Nothing has changed. Not for me atleast.

Every single thing about her came rushing back to me, triggering those water bags in my eyes.

This is not what I planned when I came here for the first time. Ever since my childhood I wanted to be a CID officer and make my parents proud of their son, whom they thought only as a spoiled kid. I grew up reading the way Daya Sir, Abhijeet Sir solved the cases. I always admired their friendship. I wanted same for me. I wanted to work under no one but Acp Pradyuman. And I worked hard for that.

I knew all my hard work paid off, when I received my appointment letter from CID Mumbai. I left my home city and joined the workplace I always dreamt of working in.

With Daya sir and Abhijeet Sir in the team led by Pradyuman, I met Freddy Sir.  
He helped me learn everything, but not how to deal with this pain. I wish he taught me this too.

 _Here again  
Swimming in these memories  
Of you my friend_

You know all those butterflies you get swimming around your stomach when you meet someone special? Yes I too got them when I saw her in that black top and black jeans, her curly hair swept back to be on a high ponytail

I don't know what attracted me to her. I have no freaking idea. Maybe it was the way she stubbornly denied me handing the envelope on her hand (which I had no idea was her appointment letter in CID). Or may be the way she smiled when she saw ACP sir. Yes, I did notice it with corner of my eyes.

'Tasha' that's what Acp sir called her. Tasha Kumar. 'Has a nice ring to it' that's what my subconscious told me back then. And I had to just stop myself for smiling like idiot.

 _All the things you said to me  
Replay round my head these nights  
Don't leave me now_

But then Acp sir asked her something that he didn't ask me or anyone that I could think of. He asked her if she had done anything remotely illegal in previous 10 days. To say I was gobsmacked would be an understatement of the century. I mean, why would anyone ask that to a newly recruited officer.

I expected her to answer with a straight no. But she stuttered and I was scared, for some unknown reasons. Hoping that she hasn't done anything wrong.

And then, Acp sir dropped the bomb, when he said she was caught with drugs in her hand bag, I felt my head getting heavy and my knees giving up. I didn't know what to say.

'Not you, please not you' that was what I was chanting at the back of my head then. Tear drops on her eyes urged my thumping heart to hold her and say everything was gonna be alright.

Acp sir told that Daya sir and Abhijeet sir found her with a packet of drugs in her back. The only thing I could see was her teary eyes. I wanted to hold her and tell her that everything was gonna be alright, although my own heart was thumping loud enough to be heard in the next room. Acp sir was furious. I could feel him burning holes on her forehead.

He asked her to pray to god, when Freddy sir came in with the test results. And with her, I prayed too. Crossing my fingers. I, with my peripheral vision, saw Freddy sir glaring me with questioning gaze. Still I prayed.

The moment Acp sir announced Tasha is in, all I wanted was to jump around like a kid who just got car who wanted for a long time. I thanked my almighty and welcomed her to the team.

 _Cos you grew wings too soon  
Can you hear me  
I'm tired of saying I'll see you soon  
How I wish it could be true  
Cos every single night  
You're always on my mind  
Show me where you hide  
Just give me a sign_

Since then, for me, everyday was so beautiful. We talked, laughed, joked, went to movies with the team, and most importantly solved so many difficult cases together.

Her smile was everything I needed to light up my day. She was my angel. But she grew her wings too soon, to go to the heaven. A day that I never in my life will I ever forget. A moment was enough, to break my heart into innumerable pieces.

 _It's me again  
Lost inside this memory  
It never ends  
Still wondering why the hell you left this world  
Far behind it breaks my heart_

My world just came crashing down, when I looked into her lifeless body. Her eyes painted with so much pain. Pain, that is not even a word to describe my state I have been in since that damn awful day.

 _I'll never know why you grew  
Your wings too soon  
Can you hear me  
I'm tired of saying I'll see you soon_

I don't even know what I am doing with my life. With she gone, she took my heart, my source of happiness with her. Only left is her name etched in what left in place of my heart. My emotions are now buried deep inside myself, where I haven't looked back from that day. That's what i thought.

Today when I saw my team I used to work with, everything was just so clear, like a vivid dream.

I walk out onto the balcony attached to my room and look up at the starry sky.

"I freaking miss you Tasha". In my hand is a photograph of her. I rub my thumb over her face. Wish I could say I will fight with my emotions, and will move on.

But I will not lie to myself, not to Tasha. I am going to embrace what destiny has to offer me. And now I decide to move back to Assam, to lead the team that has been recently activated to hunt down a separatist outfit operating from a further corner of Assam.

 _Every single time  
You're always on my mind  
Show me where you hide  
Shining in the sky  
Never fade  
Never fade  
Never fade  
Never fade_

If that's what written in my fate, let be it.

I turn around to go back to my room. Locking the balcony door, I place the photo frame on the nightstand.

"Guess it's my time to say goodbye Tasha. I love you." I murmur and saunter off to my wardrobe.

 _I'm tired of saying I'll see you soon  
How I wish it could be true  
Every single time  
You're always on my mind  
I miss you by my side  
I guess I'll say goodbye._

 **Third person's POV**.

A gush of wind came inside Vivek's room through an open window and kissed his face, carrying a whisper all the way from heaven to him and his ears

"I too love you Vivek" .

* * *

A/n: That was it. I have never wrote anything so serious before. Ending was toh bilkul bekar, I know. So don't really know how was it..

Once again the song is **Never Fade** by **Josh Devine** and **Ollie Green.** _Random fact: Josh is a bae._

Those of you waiting for Suit and Tie update, please keep patience. I am planning the biggest drama of that story, lol. No seriously though, I am planning something. But but, it's really impossible for me to put that idea into words in between my exams and part time job schedule. I am trying I promise. If y'all really can't wait, I can update a filler chapter this week. But you will have to give me sometime if you want drama in next chapter. At least till next week.

Baaki aaplog decide kar lo. Thank you.

All the love.x

Kuki xx


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